the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I need a beard to bite.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
