You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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