You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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