yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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