I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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