Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
