Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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