Non-Jews are for practice
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
