Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
