Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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