now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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