i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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