summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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