look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
