google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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