Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
time to smoke my breakfast
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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