He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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