so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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