Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
