Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize