I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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