And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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