I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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