I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
