At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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