btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
