She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
