It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
