And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize