the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
