who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
