Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize
