No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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