Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
