You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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