He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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