I didn't shave. On purpose
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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