She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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