i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
