You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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