So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
