girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
