Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
