he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize