This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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