I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
