Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I just want nice things and good sex
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
