he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
