so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
