So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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