everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize