What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
